Hi There, My Name Is…

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My name is Gabriel Landriault. Admitting this is kind of a big deal, at least to me, because I’ve been blogging anonymously for almost five years.

Not including the six years I pretended my four Geocities accounts didn’t exist, I started blogging in late 2006 in reaction to a fairly horrific accident… where I accidentally erased three years worth of edits to my book. I have to put “accidentally” in there because there are moments when I think maybe it wasn’t.

In 2001 I signed a contract with ECW Press, a Toronto-based publisher to write a non-fiction, 80,000 word book about politics and my family.

Very late one night in 2006 I migrated everything I had ever produced — movies, stories, news articles, The Book — from my ancient 4G hard-drive PC to my brand spanking new Dell server farm of a PC. It’s black and cool looking. A few days later I went searching for the book, and only found early versions… but nothing recent. This is when I started growing my very first beard.

My first reporting job was as a columnist for The Review, the local (Vankleek Hill) paper. My grade eleven English teacher made it happen. I wrote about school politics, and local council meetings. I was seventeen, and my column was called “From The High Chair” because the stool the publisher gave me to sit on was ridiculously high.

In total I’ve worked as a reporter for seven years, mostly I covered technology issues like online privacy.

I haven’t worked as a reporter full time since 2001. In between now and then I also put in two years in “communications”. For a year I worked as a writer at an agency called Benchmark PorterNovelli, and then I was with Clearnet — during the switch to Telus Mobility. I sucked at both jobs.

I honestly do not believe I produced anything for either company.

…although I did get a surreal opportunity to take photos backstage at a Britney Spears concert for Benchmark. So, that was pretty cool… she’s tiny.

I signed the book contract while I was at Clearnet. I honestly thought it’d take a year, then I’d use it to get back into reporting.

But the “family” part of the book proved to be… difficult. Especially on my brain.

The reason I wanted to blog anonymously was because most of it would be about the Family + Brain stuff. And I didn’t want my mother to be waiting in line at the grocery store, and have someone ask her about something I had written. Also… there are some craz-eee MoFo’s online.

So as I moved from writing about myself, to starting another blog where I could write about news, I remained anonymous. Which made sense, barely… because finding one could lead to finding the other. Or something.

But what ended up happening was I created a five-year gap on the Internet, and in my life. The only work I was producing was on two (sometimes three) anonymous blogs. And so far it’s been really good work.

So someone searching for me on Google brings up a very few pieces I wrote for Toronto-based Computer Dealer News and eBusiness Journal, and Ottawa’s Silicon Valley North (SVN), from 1998 and 1999… it also brings up my SETI@home profile.

But it doesn’t tell anyone about the Ontario Community Newspaper Association award for column writing I won in 1997, or the CATA Award for Excellence in Science and Technology Reporting I — and two other reporters — won… also in 1997 — it was a pretty good year, we got award shirts.

And it doesn’t bring up anything from this blog. Again, it’s like I’ve turned invisible and my archives are slowly eroding. All of the work I did for SVN, for example, disappeared when it was bought by the Ottawa Business Journal.

Which totally sucks when you’re trying to make a point about the status of reporting in an online world in a Facebook forum…

Blogging anonymously, especially when it’s the only content you’re creating, sucks donkey testicles when it comes to explaining to people what it is you do all night.

“Sure… I publish 12,000 words a month, but you can’t read any of them.”

It’ll be nice to be able to talk to my grandfather about what I’m reporting on again.

Something I plan on doing is reporting on the region where I live… this part of Eastern Ontario is the poorest (off reserve) region in Canada, it also leads Canada in illiteracy rates, drug and alcohol addiction and unemployment.

It also has an incredible amount of potential. So there should be something to write about there…

Anyway. None of this matters, or will ever matter, if I don’t update this thing. Regularly.

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Posted in CSN:AFU Aboot Me, Entertainment, Journalism, Punk, Reporting, Vankleek Hill, Vankleek Hill History | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

Almost Like Art | Christine On The Street

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Of all the photos I’ve ever taken, and some of of them have been pretty sweet, this one is my favourite. It’s the b/w contrast, the way Christine is standing, how she’s looking at the camera, her eyeliner, the street and sidewalk stretching into infinity, my shadow on the sidewalk… I’ve taken better photos, and even more interesting ones, but this is my absolute favourite. The song is “Dissolved Girl” by Massive Attack.

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Technical Stuff: I used my Minolta SLR, or my ‘big boy camera’, for this shot. At this point I was still enamoured with Kodak Pro CN 400 film. It’s a black and white film that can be developed in a colour processor. So instead of waiting a week for my Tri-X or TMax to get developed, I could use any of Toronto’s street corner 30 Minute developers. Unfortunately the process leaves a green tinge on the prints and negatives. Which should have been an important lesson after developing the first two or three rolls. But I think I shot over 600 rolls with the CN BS. If you want a b/w photo, use b/w film.

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Christine and I lived as roommates together for about eight months along with another girl, Aurora. It was a basement “granny apartment” in the uber-swanky Rosedale part of Toronto. The ceiling was barely six-feet high, and there was no sound proofing between us and the main floor, so the kids upstairs used to make noise just to get a reaction from the kids downstairs — Christine (19) and Aurora (18) — who would then pound on the ceiling and scream at the children. It was actually a decent place to sleep. And I got to shop for groceries with CBC anchor, Peter Mansbridge.

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Posted in Almost Like Art, Black And White, Cool Stuff, Favourites, From My Wall, Photography, Portraits | Leave a comment

Photos I Am Not Even Marginally Proud Of Taking 001

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You’d think business would be booming, but in these “tough economic times” I guess even Satan had to take a second job… weird he’d end up driving a cab in Ottawa. Go with what you know, I guess. The song is AC/DC’s “Hell’s Bells”, from their 1980 ultra-classic ‘Back In Black’.

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Technical Stuff: I did my best to make sure it was in focus. I did this by half-depressing the trigger, and allowing the computer in my camera enough time to adjust the pixels, as translated through my lens. That’s about it… I guess getting enough of the car in the frame so it could be recognized as a taxi was important. It wouldn’t have made much sense to have just the number 666 and a grey background.

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Other than the “evil taxi” angle there’s absolutely nothing about this photo that warrants wasting 180k worth of space on the Internet. In ten years, when the Internet finally reaches its capacity, and the people in charge of purging all the crap from the system to make room for more Jonas Brothers videos find this post, I’ll have no problem when it goes missing. Until then, take a look at how in focus that car is… oh yeah, I own that bitch.

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Posted in Cool Stuff, Entertainment, Everyday Stuff, Marginally Half Decent, Photography | 2 Comments

Portraits Of People Who Can Make Me Smile 003

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I spent a couple of weeks walking around town at night looking for cool lighting situations, and this was one of them. It’s not a big town. I have another shot that showcases the light better, but this — despite being a little out of focus — was the better shot of my very pregnant girlfriend. This was the end of a muggy two-week heat wave where the temperature never got below 30C (86F), so we were enjoying the cool air on the porch of our apartment building… which, when my girlfriend is standing in a certain way, looks a lot like Spanish Harlem.

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Technical Stuff: The porch light is behind and above us, the background is lit by two street lights. The camera (Kodak EasyShare C533 pocket digital) was set on ‘landscape’, which (I think) means wide angle, and open one stop. Once you’ve got that, just find yourself a woman with vaguely Spanish / Native Canadian features, knock her up, then wait five months.

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There are a few things I really like about this photo — my girlfriend for one, but the broken bricks behind her, and the way the light works around them, are what make it special. Which makes sense because they’re the only things in focus. If I were to get serious about this shot I’d crop at the window, and lose the air conditioner — which I hate, mostly because it’s not ours, and the green chair. But the chances of me getting serious about a photo right now are slim, none and nada… no time, I’ve got a kid coming in a few weeks and I still haven’t grown up yet. The song is “Spanish Caravan” by The Doors from ‘Waiting For The Sun’ (1968).

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Posted in Family, Photography, Portraits, Vankleek Hill Photos | 3 Comments

Something Wickedly Overpriced This Way Comes

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I haven’t walked through the gates of my hometown summer fair since I was a kid… and, from what I remember, back then we mostly crawled through a hole in the fence separating the fair grounds from my friends house. My fair avoidance is mostly because I don’t like crowds. But, seriously, the games are almost guaranteed to be rigged, the prizes were probably stolen from children in the last town the Carnies worked, the rides are a broken bolt away from having my hometown featured on CNN, and it’s just way too frigging expensive.

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Technical Stuff: I had the exposure settings on my wee pocket digital set at +2, which, in a real camera, would mean the aperture was open to allow more light to the film. With a digital it basically means the tiny internal computer modified the brightness/contrast settings on the image with some rudimentary PhotoShop-type program. I was also resting the camera lens on a link of a chain-link fence because I didn’t have my tripod with me.

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Admission to Canada’s Wonderland amusement park, plus a handful of ride tickets, is $35. Just to get on the grounds of Vankleek Hill’s fair this year cost $20 for the day. Thing is, even if you took the time to examine each cow, you could have seen the entire thing in under two hours… if you took each ride twice, walked with a limp, and ate a long lunch. The funniest part was the concert on the last night where the featured band forgot how to play AC/DC. Watching that would have been worth the price of admission, but we could hear them for free from my friends place where we were roasting marshmallows. The song is “As Wicked” by Rancid, from their 1995 classic ‘…And Out Come The Wolves.’.

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Posted in Cool Stuff, Favourites, From My Wall, Occasional Events, Photography, Seasonal, Vankleek Hill Photos | 5 Comments

Red Sky At Night Mmm Mmm Mmm

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Red sky at night, sailor’s delight, red sky in the morning, sailor’s take warning because she’s probably got an STD. Better listen, because that’s a direct quote from Jesus Christ. Seriously. Jesus Christ of Nazareth is quoted, in the Bible, as having said “when it is evening, ye say, it will be fair weather: for the sky is red. And in the morning, it will be foul weather to day: for the sky is red and louring.” I don’t know what “louring” means, but I assume it’s an STD of some kind.

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Technical Stuff: The first thing you have to do to get a photo like this is make sure there’s no traffic. I was standing in the middle of a crosswalk with two blind turns. It’s not exactly dodging gunfire on the Gaza Strip, but every situation has its own unique dangers. I also set the exposure at ‘+1’ which, on a real camera, would mean I closed the aperture a couple of stops (less light). No, digital cameras are not real cameras, and all of us using them to capture our important moments are all going to be fucked when they finally change the default image coding standard away from jpeg — bet you didn’t know saving an image as a jpg/jpeg automatically reduces its quality.

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So the sum total of direct quotes attributed to Jesus in the Bible comes out to a couple hundred words. Maybe. The guy lived for thirty-three years, I’m sure he said a lot of things. But the editors pared it all down to a couple hundred words, and thirty-four of them are about the weather. And the translators couldn’t even get the rhyming scheme down. Honestly, I think the poor bastard got crucified twice. The song is “The Storm” by Big Country from their 1983 debut, self-titled album.

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Posted in Everyday Stuff, Nature, Photography, Sunrise Project, Vankleek Hill Photos | 1 Comment